Tag Archive for ‘Guest Post’ at save the assistants

Tag Archive for 'Guest Post'

guest post: the assistants, coming soon to a television near you

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on July 1, 2009

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Hey guys, Garrett here. So, I’ve shirked my guest post duties once this week — but, in my defense, I was/am/have been sick. I’m fairly certain it isn’t swine flu (mostly … okay maybe less sure). And yes, I’m still at work.

This friday, The N (for those who aren’t aware, home to the Canadian cult-hit Degrassi) premieres their new sitcom The Assistants. The show follows four assistants in Hollywood as they compete for their boss’ approval. If the above photo is any indication this will involve caring for a bonsai, which is no easy feat. Let me tell you.

The official website doesn’t shed too much light on the show, but it DOES include quizzes that tell you how competitive or manipulative you are. Because every good assistant knows, these are the keys to success. Without those traits, we’d probably just yell a lot and fall over. Here, take a look:

Finally, a show that seems to get what being an assistant in Hollywood is REALLY like. Right? … Right?

Bueller?

guest post: hollywood assistants get their own movie

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on June 24, 2009

in Fictional Assistants and Guest Post

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The first half of the trailer is pretty good, but then it just gets earnest. Let us know what you think.

guest post: “the proposal”, or how i learned to stop worrying and love my boss

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on June 22, 2009

in Fictional Assistants, Former Assistants Done Good and Guest Post

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On Friday night, a friend and I did our best to fuel the economy by going to see The Proposal, starring Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds.

As Lilit has mentioned before, Reynolds plays the assistant to Bullock’s tough as nails (and maybe a little emotionally damaged) publishing executive. When there’s a mix up involving her visa, she coerces him into marrying her in order to avoid being deported and (SPOILER ALERT) they ultimately fall in love. Like you didn’t see that one coming.

As any good tyrranical boss would, Bullock uses her best tools to get Reynolds to marry her: intimidation and abuse. Until, that is — and here’s where the ranks of assistants who went to see this movie undoubtably went “Hell yes!” — he realizes that the assistant/boss power dynamic has shifted in his favor. This, along with their amazing chemistry, provides fodder for some extremely gratifying interplay when they visit his family for the weekend.

Pete Chiarelli, the film’s screenwriter, worked as an assistant after grad school but didn’t have a terrible experience of his own to draw from:

The idea came from me working in Hollywood, but isn’t autobiographical. Although I did work as an assistant to a woman, she was a very cool boss. However, I did have a lot of friends who worked for horrible bosses, men and women who were completely self-centered and tyrannical. But what struck me is that it paid for these bosses to be this way, it paid off for them professionally. It made sense for them to be an asshole. So, what would happen if you took one of these bosses out of their environment and forced them to act like a real human being?

What if, indeed.

reviewing the assistant of ‘high school musical’

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on November 4, 2008

in Fictional Assistants and Guest Post

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STA extends a warm welcome to Lisa-Marie from Glasgow, who previously guest-blogged about Jennifer Hudson’s assistant role in the Sex and the City movie. Now, she’s weighing in on Jemma Mackenzie-Brown (pictured), who plays the PA to bratty rich girl Sharpay (Ashley Tisdale) in ‘”High School Musical 3.”

“Why the hell does a high school student need a personal assistant?” Lilit demanded to know when she initially broke the news about British actress Jemma Mackenzie-Brown’s casting as Sharpay’s personal assistant in the new High School Musical movie. Well, lots of reasons. There’s prom, finals, graduation… life as a high school senior is a stressful one, and nobody knows that better than East High’s “fabulous” queen bee.

Yeah, you might have noticed the sarcasm there - but life’s about to get more stressful as Sharpay eyes up the big part in what’s going to be the last of the titular High School Musicals for these seniors. While being on hand to help Sharpay learn her lines is probably not the worst thankless task that has come to the attention of Save The Assistants, having to keep to a coordinating wardrobe schedule - that will never, EVER include orange - is a bit more onerous.

Assistant as fashion accessory? Perhaps, when even the “sweet” English accent seems part of the package. But there’s that other old cinematic cliche about English accents - is Tiara Goal what she seems? You’ll have to go see it to find out.

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buzzword: meet ‘mancuso’

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on August 22, 2008

in Buzzwords and Guest Post

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This buzzword comes to us courtesy of Nicole, who blogs over at The Loudmouth Protestant.

Obnoxious. Over-compensating. Megalomaniac. These are the characteristics of a “Mancuso.” In a perfect world full of Wall Street douchebags, Mancuso would fit right in. But Mancuso doesn’t live in that world. Mancusos rely on delusions of grandeur and external accoutrement to convince people they are way more important than they actually are. Mancusos pollute the confined spaces of elevators with vapid conversations on their Blackberries about closing non-existent deals. Mancusos are employed in bottom-feeder organizations that they wish were more like the companies they mimic. Think “Boiler Room’s” JT Marlin.

As you can see, one of the greater purposes of this post is to see how many times I can use the name Mancuso because while I have extreme disdain for the person and the archetype, I also derive a strange pleasure in saying the name.

So what’s up with the name Mancuso? I’m glad you asked.

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guest post: alfred, best assistant a (bat)man could ask for

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on July 21, 2008

in Fictional Assistants

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I am one of the seven people in America who didn’t go to see “The Dark Knight” this weekend. Luckily, the always-reliable John Brooks went to a midnight screening and reports back about Alfred (Michael Caine), the loyal assistant who helps Bruce Wayne and his alter ego, Batman.

Early estimates (source: my head) put box office receipts for The Dark Knight’s opening day somewhere in the 400 bajillion dollar range. That’s good news for the fake world’s most beloved fictional PA: Alfred Pennyworth. Since I found myself with nothing else to do at 12:01 AM on Thursday night/Friday morning, I casually decided, purely on a whim, to see this largely overlooked little movie from the guy who made Memento.

Part surrogate father, part loyal servant to the great, bi-polar, largely insane avenger for justice, Bruce Wayne (known by night by his stage name “Batman”), Alfred finally gets the praise, screen time, and the chance to utter all the best aw-shucks words of comfort to Mr. Childhood Trauma he so richly deserves.

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this just in: you’re fired

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on June 16, 2008

in Horror Stories

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STA reader “Anna” is an employee of McClatchy, a company that owns newspapers all over the country, from the Sacramento Bee to the Miami Herald. Employees found out on the news–not from their superiors–that axes were about to fall. Here’s her story.

No matter how many terrible days you have at work, most of us can go in every day secure that if the day does come where there are companywide layoffs, you won’t find out by picking up the morning paper.

Ironically, this is not true if you work in the newspaper business.

Employees of the McClatchy Company, third largest newspaper owner in the U.S., are learning today through the Wall Street Journal, Poynter and other sources that 11 percent of their workforce would be cut today.

Maybe I’m taking this a little personally because I work for one of this company’s papers in the southeast (but only for another four days, bitches! I put in my notice last week) but this shows a complete lack of respect on the part of Gary Pruitt, the company’s chief executive, for the people who have made him his millions.

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’sex & the city’ reader review

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on June 4, 2008

in Fictional Assistants and Guest Post

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As promised, here’s a reader submission regarding the portrayal of Louise (Jennifer Hudson), Carrie’s assistant in Sex and the City. The writer is Lisa-Marie from Glasgow, who writes a blog called Last Year’s Girl. NOTE: This post contains spoilers. If you haven’t seen the movie yet, read at your discretion.

I never saw any more than a couple of episodes of Sex and the City during its oh-so-fabulous, early noughties heyday; but perhaps the one defining image it seared into the pop cultural receptor at the front of my brain is of Sarah Jessica Parker as Carrie Bradshaw, perched in front of a MacBook as she files that week’s column late into the evening. And so I feel a little bit cheated after watching the big budget continuation of Ms Bradshaw’s tramps and travails through Manhattan - it turns out that, while she has the money to pay for a top of the range laptop and sparkly pink mobile phone, she doesn’t even know how to send a text message. What’s a girl to do but hire an assistant?

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lisa simpson joins the assistant class

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on May 21, 2008

in Fictional Assistants and Guest Post

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Many thanks to STA friend John of My Reviews for giving me a heads up about a recent episode of The Simpsons where Lisa becomes Krusty’s assistant. Since Lisa was a feminist hero to my eight-year-old self, it makes me happy to hear she’s still kicking butt despite the fact I haven’t seen a new episode of the show in years. John gives us his synopsis:

We wouldn’t blame you if you stopped watching “The Simpsons” 8 years ago, when it had passed its “Planet of the Apes: The Musical” prime and began its decline into 5 minutes of vaguely funny non sequiturs and random Lenny jokes stretched out into 22 minutes of preposterous and tenuous storylines.

Which is to say, you probably missed this week’s episode “All About Lisa”, where, through a series of unlikely events, Krusty hires Lisa to be his (unpaid) assistant, after Lisa informs crusty that The Discovery Channel is run entirely by interns and doesn’t have a single paid employee. [Editor's Note: I'm pretty sure this is true.]

Krusty, true to form, instantly turns into the boss from hell, requiring her assistance when he gets pastrami stuck in her teeth, instructing her to pay attention when he tells Nelson “I’ll trash you in my memoirs” (since she’ll be writing his memoirs), and making loud, ambiguously-phrased, demands that she do all his errands (”Now go get me my dry-cleaning, which is my code word for ‘Scotch’. And get me my Scotch, which is my code word for ‘my bookie’. And also, go get my dry cleaning!”)

The good news is that Lisa eventually works her way to the top, rendering her abusive boss obsolete in the process.

My favorite line: “What are you standing around for? I wish I was paying you so I could dock your salary!”

guest post: reviewing gwyneth paltrow in ‘iron man’

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on May 6, 2008

in Fictional Assistants and Guest Post

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STA friend John Brooks of My ReViews is a huge superhero fan, so we asked him to report back to us on how Gwyneth Paltrow did playing an assistant in Iron Man. Paltrow plays Virginia “Pepper” Potts, the redheaded Girl Friday to Robert Downey Jr.’s boss Tony Stark.

There are a lot of reasons we love Iron Man (which grossed over a jillion dollars this past weekend): Robert Downey Jr. as millionaire industrialist womanizing player-turned superhero Tony Stark; the amazing effects; the fact that it contains actual, three-dimensional human characters; that awesome superhero suit; Robert Downey Jr. And call us self-absorbed, but what we love most is the portrayal of Tony’s personal assistant, Pepper Potts. And so let us take this opportunity to bestow mad STA props to the following:-To Gwyneth Paltrow, for not thinking she’s too good to take on an assistant job, even when she is only playing one in an enormously-budgeted Hollywood epic.

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