Anyone who has read this site – or the book – knows how much I like to swear. But when you’re in a situation where swearing wouldn’t be kosher (i.e. the office), you have to adopt “work mouth.” Urban Dictionary defines work mouth as:
A form of self-censorship practiced at work to avoid offensive or cuss words. Typically includes cuss-replacements you learned from your grandma. Potentially embarrassing if accidentally used outside of work at parties or in the company of your drunk friends.
May also be used in the company of grandparents, teachers, preachers, and others who disapprove of cussing.
I remember reading once that the guys in Blur used “blinking” in place of cuss words when they were doing interviews or talking to their parents, and I have started using it. “Give me the blinking money, you blink!” really has a nice ring to it, don’t you think?
Robert Collins, a Maryland man who works for the Department of Corrections, was told he had to give his supervisors his Facebook password as part of a re-certification process. While I’ve talked a lot on this site about being smart on social networking sites, giving your password to your boss is totally not OK under any circumstances. The Maryland ACLU has taken up Collins’ cause:
Once upon a time, there was a girl we’ll call Jodi. Jodi interviewed for a job at Company A and one at Company B. Luckily, she got offered both positions. She accepted Company B’s offer and then emailed Company A to let them know. Here’s Jodi’s email:
Dear [Male Exec] and [Female Exec],
Thank you again for the opportunity for the position at [Company A].
However, another opportunity has come along for me within my field of
study, and I have decided to accept it. Thank you again.
Sincerely,
[Jodi]
And here’s the response she got:
[Jodi],
I am literally speechless! This is totally unprofessional and
demonstrates a lack of personal integrity.
Disappointed and disgusted,
[Male Exec]
Um, what exactly is wrong with Jodi’s email? She was professional and polite. Sometimes people interview for more than one job, male exec. Get over yourself.
Although I really do like Lois Frankel’s book Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office, the squicky way that Citibank has appropriated some of her advice and felt compelled to hand it out to their female employees kind of rubs me the wrong way.
While the internet is kind of like the Wild West in terms of what’s allowed and what’s not, there is one rule I think everyone can agree on: don’t use all caps. IT LOOKS LIKE YELLING. Anyway, one company decided not only to take a firm stance against all-caps, but to show no mercy to people who wrote that way. Vicki Walker, an employee of ProCare Health in New Zealand, was let go from her job after sending out an all-staff email written with the caps lock key on.
Walker sued ProCare for wrongful dismissal, and won, getting a settlement. Though her email annoyed coworkers, she pointed out that ProCare did not have an approved company style guide. Even though her all-caps bothered people, there was no specific protocol on how emails were supposed to look. I’m sure that was ProCare’s #1 agenda item as soon as the lawsuit ended.
Do you think an all-caps email is a good reason to fire someone? I’d say no, but five or six in a row from the same person might convince me otherwise.
The British Trade Union Conference has suggested that stiletto heels should be banned at workplaces in the United Kingdom. While I’m not more on Team Ballet Flat than Team Stiletto, I’m not usually interested in creating office dress codes. This one, though, is kind of interesting – the proposal isn’t about telling women how to dress and imposing gender norms on them, it’s about, oddly, making them comfortable.
From their proposal:
The motion, tabled by the Society of Chiropodists and Podiatrists, states: “Congress believes high heels may look glamorous on the Hollywood catwalks but are completely inappropriate for the day-today working environment.
“Feet bear the brunt of daily life, and for many workers prolonged standing, badly fitted footwear, and in particular high heels can be a hazard. Around two million days a year are lost through sickness as a result of lower limb disorders.
“Many employers in the retail sector force women workers to wear high heels as part of their dress code.
“More must be done to raise awareness of this problem so that women workers and their feet are protected.”
While I don’t think banning high heels outright is necessarily the way to go, I do like that they don’t put all the blame on women – I have several female friends who work in offices where high heels are mandatory, and this is a ridiculous, outdated idea put in place by male bosses who want women to conform to a certain visual standard. I think the Congress makes the excellent point that this silly request from some companies is actually really harmful to womens’ health in the meantime.
The now-former Miss California USA, Carrie Prejean, whose comments about gay marriage and internet feud with Perez Hilton made her way more famous than the actual Miss USA winner (who is from my home state of North Carolina – go NC!), has finally lost her crown. The official reason stated by the pageant was that Prejean violated her contract by doing appearances without clearing them/getting them approved by the state pageant board. Obviously they are really pissed at her, because they leaked (or allowed to leak) an email exchange between her and California pageant director Keith Lewis. Here is one of the emails Prejean sent (you can see the whole exchange on Jezebel):
I expect you to be forwarding me ALL email requests and interview requests to me. I know how you are and its not right if you are selecting things for me. Thanks for your cooperation And fyi I am a presenter of medals at the special olympics in a few weeks for the summer games. So now u know I am doing this and I expect your full support. Also I was asked to fill in for a dj on a local radio show.. Ill be reading from a show biz script monday. I am doing this
As I’ve said before, women have it way harder than men when it comes to appropriate office dressing, especially in the summer. In addition to figuring out hemline length and strap thickness, there’s one more element to summertime business casual: cleavage.
If you’re on the flatter side, like me, it’s a lot easier to get away with wearing lower cut tops at work, since it’s incredibly unlikely you’ll have anything to expose. But if you’ve been blessed with a fuller figure, you have to be extra careful about what you wear. It’s sad but true – even though you didn’t ask for your boobs or ask everyone to base their opinions of you on said boobs, they will. People will talk to your breasts instead of your face and, at work, when you’re doing everything you can to be taken seriously, a button coming loose at an inopportune moment could be the kiss of death. Depending what industry you’re in, cleavage can go either way – I’ve known women who work at restaurants and get better tips if they show more skin, as well as women in fashion who hide their breasts when the gamine look is back in style.
Based on my own entirely unscientific survey, cleavage was fine if you had a male boss and totally verboten if you had a female one. Do any of you have such stories to report about your own boobs or someone else’s in the office?
I feel like women have it much tougher when it comes to proper business attire. It’s pretty hard for men to go wrong with a suit (although my former boss and his “fun” ties with dumb prints on them sure did his hardest to disprove that statement), but women have to navigate everything from skirt length to heel height. If you’d asked me what I thought about wearing makeup at work, I would have guessed that women wearing obvious makeup at work was a faux pas, but a recent British study seems to prove me wrong:
64 per cent of directors said that women who wore make-up look more professional and 18 per cent of directors said that women who do not wear make-up “look like they can’t be bothered to make an effort.”
This Times of London article, which wants to present itself as helpful but is actually totally condescending, advises women on their makeup options. The author suggests going to a department store and getting a makeover from the consultants (and probably buying a lot of expensive products as well, right?), plucking eyebrows, using self-tanner and/or a bronzer, and even goes so far as to suggest that men should try sporting makeup as well.
Maybe some people think wearing makeup is the answer. I think “stop judging people by their looks as long as they’re presentable and dressed professionally” is a more efficient plan, but perhaps I’m in the minority on that one. After all – I work from home. It’s a miracle when I put on clothes instead of pajamas.
What about you? Do you feel pressure to wear makeup or to put on a certain kind of makeup for work?
When it’s cold, it’s easy to look more formal at work. You’re already all covered up and wearing thick, non-transparent fabrics. But with summer coming (or if you live in someplace other than the Northeast, summer might be there already), you start trying to walk that line between cute summer attire and proper work dress. You can always throw a cardigan over your sundress or stick flip-flops in your bag while you sport loafers at the office, but … what about shorts? One article examines the trend-that’s-now-too-longstanding-to-be-a-trend:
In May 2006, when shorts first started making their way into city offices in the US, The New York Times’ Ruth la Ferla put it down to an easing of workplace dress standards.
“Dress codes these days are as elastic as a bungee cord, expanding to accommodate all manner of once unthinkable workplace infractions,” she wrote. “This year that increasingly flexible standard has stretched to encompass shorts, of all things.”
La Ferla too had waved them off as a passing “infraction”. A faux pas. One that we’d all laugh about later. She too was wrong.
As for your office, my general attitude about dress codes is “wait and see.” If someone higher up than you can get away with wearing shorts, then you’re good to go. Otherwise, you can try wearing a pair but keep a pair of pants in your bag just in case the office manager gives you a dirty look and you feel like you might be veering too far on the side of informal. Just, whatever you do, don’t wear a skort. No one can pull that off.
The British Trade Union Conference has suggested that stiletto heels 
The now-former Miss California USA, Carrie Prejean, whose comments about gay marriage and internet feud with Perez Hilton made her way more famous than the actual Miss USA winner (who is from my home state of North Carolina – go NC!), has finally lost her crown. The official reason stated by the pageant was that Prejean violated her contract by doing appearances without clearing them/getting them approved by the state pageant board. Obviously they are really pissed at her, because they leaked (or allowed to leak) an email exchange between her and California pageant director Keith Lewis. Here is one of the emails Prejean sent (you can see the whole exchange on 
As I’ve said before, women have it way harder than men when it comes to appropriate office dressing, 
I feel like women have it much tougher when it comes to proper business attire. It’s pretty hard for men to go wrong with a suit (although my former boss and his “fun” ties with dumb prints on them sure did his hardest to disprove that statement), but women have to navigate everything from skirt length to heel height. If you’d asked me what I thought about wearing makeup at work, I would have guessed that women wearing obvious makeup at work was a faux pas, but 
When it’s cold, it’s easy to look more formal at work. You’re already all covered up and wearing thick, non-transparent fabrics. But with summer coming (or if you live in someplace other than the Northeast, summer might be there already), you start trying to walk that line between cute summer attire and proper work dress. You can always throw a cardigan over your sundress or stick flip-flops in your bag while you sport loafers at the office, but … what about shorts? 
