Sure, you know what road rage is. As a New Yorker who doesn’t drive, I occasionally suffer from bursts of “subway rage.” (Dear woman across from me, your purse does not need its own seat!) However, my fellow disgruntled cubicle dwellers of the world should also be on the lookout for “desk rage.” As we spend more and more time at the office and those offices try to squeeze more people into less space, it’s only logical that people get more fed up with each other and become less patient. Via Psychology Today:
A U.S. News and World Report poll says that 89% of U.S. workers said incivility is a serious problem and 78% said it is getting worse. The cost of workplace violence to employers is estimated somewhere between $6 to $36 billion annually.
Ever said “Such and such coworker makes me so mad I could just kill her?” Odds are good you aren’t alone. So how can we curb this growing problem? I vote for things like flex time, more vacation, and, if possible, working with people who don’t finish off the last of the coffee and then refuse to refill. Seriously. I hate that guy.
In Shakespeare’s time, there was a person employed by the theater who had one job and one job only: to be the guy who started clapping. Now, we might recognize the one person in the movie who starts the slow clap, and the claque was his predecessor. Once the claque started clapping, everyone would know that the play was over and start clapping along with him.
In many offices, there’s a corporate culture that keeps people from taking breaks or going out to lunch. Sometimes, it’s in the company guidelines and enforced by higher-ups. In many offices, though, those policies are self-enforced. People convince themselves that they need to eat at their desks and work for long hours, even though there’s no one telling them they have to. That sensibility pervades a culture, and employees wind up policing each other. This was the case at one company where I worked – even though there was no rule about lunches or breaks, nobody ever left their desks, and they would give you really dirty looks if you dared to duck out for fifteen minutes in the middle of the day. This strange behavior had nothing to do with actual workload, but it had everything to do with needing to “look busy” and seem like the hardest worker.
Well, one day I decided not to stand for it anymore. I became the claque. For five straight days, I got up every day at 1:00 PM, left the office without saying a word, had lunch somewhere, and returned half an hour later. Then at 6:30 – the time we were told the day ended for us – I would leave. Even though almost everyone would be done with their work by the end of the day, there was this weird unwritten rule that everyone would just stay there, dicking around on Facebook or whatever, just because no one wanted to be the first to leave. Let’s just say I was more than happy to volunteer to be the first one to leave. Yeah, I probably got called a slacker behind my back, but magically every other coworker in the office would immediately start packing their bags as soon as I got on the elevator.
Sometimes an office needs a claque. Try being yours once in a while – it does a lot to change office culture, even on a tiny level.
Are you infuriated by the fact that rich bankers get Washington bailouts and six-figure bonuses while you’re still scraping by? You are far from alone. Tim Hunkin, an English man who runs an arcade in Southwold, Suffolk realized there was a market for people who wanted to take out their frustration on capitalist pigs – so he created “Whack a Banker,” a game based on the popular “Whack a Mole,” where little heads of men in business suits pop out of holes, and you beat the hell out of them with a mallet. Hunkin, who charges a mere 40 pence per turn, is already raking in the cash.
”It’s proving very popular. I keep having to replace worn-out mallets.”
”And, of course, the bankers never really lose. If you win the game a banker’s voice says: ‘You win. We retire. Thank you very much to the taxpayer for paying our pensions’.”
I have got to schedule a trip out there.
Everywhere you go, there’s a story on TV or in a newspaper or online about how people are cutting back on luxuries during the difficult economy. More workers are bringing lunches to work instead of going out, carpooling or using public transit to save money on gas, and cutting back on entertainment like concerts and vacations. Now, a study from Rodale (which, coincidentally, publishes Men’s Health magazine) claims that health and wellness related expenses like gym memberships are among the last things to go when someone is trimming their budget. Reasons offered include:
- Working out helps relieve the stress of increased work demands, bad job interviews, and the like
- People want to get the most use they can out of their monthly dues
- Gyms are offering new programs like meditation and yoga classes or, for one gym, a “power nap” session
- It’s a great way to meet people when you can’t afford to go to bars
- If you’re in better shape you can improve your health and possibly cut down on health care costs
- If you’ve been laid off, you may find yourself with a lot of time on your hands
Has the recession made you a gym rat, or was your health club membership the first thing to go out the window?
It usually isn’t up for debate whether abused assistants are bitter – the question is more likely to be about how bitter they are. But last week, at the American Psychiatric Association annual meeting, the members discussed a new phenomenon they’ve named Post-Traumatic Bitterness Disorder. Similar to its cousin, PTSD, the newly named ailment is described as “angry plus helpless.” It’s becoming increasingly common as already-beleaguered workers cope with the results of a suffering economy, thus compounding their emotions. In addition to being disgruntled, they’re being laid off, forced into a combo job, or hanging on for dear life. Here’s what German Dr. Michael Linden, who coined the PTBD term, had to say:
Embittered people are typically good people who have worked hard at something important, such as a job, relationship or activity, Linden says. When something unexpectedly awful happens — they don’t get the promotion, their spouse files for divorce or they fail to make the Olympic team — a profound sense of injustice overtakes them. Instead of dealing with the loss with the help of family and friends, they cannot let go of the feeling of being victimized. Almost immediately after the traumatic event, they become angry, pessimistic, aggressive, hopeless haters.
Wow, so did he come and spy on me in order to come up with this diagnosis? And believe me, “failing to make the Olympic team” is something so unlikely to happen to me that I am not worried about how I might react when it happens. Trust.
It seems like getting promoted would be awesome for you – you’d earn more money, get a better parking space, and be able to boss people around. However, a recent study at England’s Warwick University claims the opposite. After interviewing 1,000 workers who had been promoted into management roles, researchers determined that a promotion caused one’s mental health to decline.
Experts said being given extra responsibility could lead to more stress, anxiety and depression.
They said the problems could be exacerbated by workers who were promoted having less time to access health services.
GP visits fell by 20% to less than two a year after promotion, the study found.
But what about that major ego boost that comes from getting promoted?
Lead researcher Chris Boyce said: “Getting promoted at work is not as great as people think.
“Our research finds that the mental health of managers typically deteriorates after a job promotion and in a way that goes beyond merely a short-term change.
“People given senior positions need to be given the proper support and training to handle the extra responsibility.”
I feel weirdly vindicated by this article. Maybe they should hire me to do a study about whether being unemployed, conversely, makes people happier? I’d venture to say yes.
I don’t drive anymore, but when I did I could definitely see why people got road rage. Now, living in New York, I get subway rage–sometimes it’s all I can do not to punch the woman who “accidentally” stepped on my foot three times. But considering how most people spend way more time at work than they do in a car or other mode of transportation, there’s been an uptick in reports of “desk rage.” Whether you’re the one on the giving end or the receiving end of yelling, hitting, name-calling, stapler-throwing, and the like, you have definitely witnessed some desk rage moments in your office.
So why are we turning into a nation of Naomi Campbells?
Continue reading ‘buzzword: desk rage’
I know what you’re thinking, but bear with me.
When Ashley and I were assistants together, I always got up at the last possible second I could and ended up at work with semi-damp hair and circles under my eyes. Ashley, on the other hand, always woke up early in the AM and did other shit before getting to the office. I always thought she was weird, but she had an excellent reason behind her schedule. My day was divided into halves: the section I spent at work, and the section I didn’t. For Ashley, the day was in thirds. She bookended the time spent at the office so that it felt like a smaller, and therefore less significant, part of her day. I’ve started doing a version of this (let’s face it, I’ll never be a morning person), and it really improves my attitude all day long. Here’s a handy list of things you can do in the AM to brighten your whole day:
- Make a great cup of homebrewed coffee or tea
- Take your dog out for a longer walk than usual or snuggle with your cat
- Do the crossword puzzle or read the comics
- Watch fifteen minutes of your favorite morning show
- Cook yourself a proper breakfast
- Walk to work, instead of using mass transit (if possible in your town)
- Let your hair air-dry
- Go to the gym
- Rock out to your favorite music
- Do yoga
Do you have a favorite pre-work AM activity? Let us know in the comments.
I love WebMD. Why? Because when I had my first panic attack, it told me I wasn’t dying. It was during my first job out of college working for a small PR firm in Silicon Valley during the Internet boom. My boss kept trying to email me something to print that wasn’t compatible with my compooter thingy. The problem really lay in the fact that once she’d email it to me, rather than seeing if it had gone through, she’d just delete it from her desktop. When I had to tell her for the third time that I couldn’t print it, she lost her shit and screamed at me.
Fun times, fun times. Anyway, the panic attack came later in the afternoon. I was sitting at my desk and my heart started thumping slowly and things got a little fuzzy, like slow-motion out of focus. I remember watching my hand move towards the phone, ready to call 911. Luckily it passed and I managed to finish out my day. That night, after searching for “heart attack” and “stroke” and then finally taking it down a notch to “panic attack”, I got to know the stress management tips provided by WebMD.
I also realized that I really didn’t like this whole stress thing, and that there were two things that were really stressing me out at that point in my life, one of which I could do something about, the other of which I couldn’t. Shortly afterwards, I quit my job and booked a flight to Europe. And that is a whole other story.
To read more about life changes that will help you cope with stress, read here. -Ashley
I don’t know about you guys, but I’ve definitely taken a day off work to cope with a breakup, or a hangover, or the hangover I got while moping about a breakup. Now a company in Japan is coming up with a system where you have a choice other than faking sick. “Heartache leave” is now being offered as a legitimate benefit by Tokyo’s Hime & Company. “Not everyone needs to take maternity leave but with heartbreak, everyone needs time off, just like when you get sick,” says their CEO.
Here’s the breakdown: Staff aged 24 years or younger can take one day off per year, while those between 25 and 29 can take two days off and those older can take three days off, the company said. While we don’t totally agree with the apportionment, we totally agree with the sentiment. It’s about time someone recognized mental health days as legitimate.
