When something big happens at a company, like a fashion house hiring a new head designer, they’ll announce the news in a press release. Or, if you’re Matthieu Blazy, you can just jump the gun by updating your LinkedIn profile. Although Blazy’s new job hadn’t been publicly announced yet, he has already changed his LinkedIn profile to indicate he’s the new head designer for Maison Martin Margiela. Felicitations, Matthieu! Now let’s hope you don’t get fired for letting the news slip.
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I just watched Back to the Future for the first time (I know, it’s shameful) and am obsessed with time travel. So the idea of responding to this ad for a time traveler’s assistant is looking reeeeeeeeeally tempting right now.
MBike magazine, which I had never heard of before today but sounds awesome, has diagnosed modern man (and, I’d presume, woman) with several diseases: “Deskorheea,” “Chronic Computerosis,” and “Armchairitis.” You can probably figure out how you got each one of them.
[Via LikeCool]
It’s normal to get depressed at the office. Here are some ways to cope. – PBS
Why your boss is probably wrong about you; or; why performance reviews are stupid and need to be abolished. – New York Times
Are business cards going the way of the VHS player? – Fortune
When it comes to mental health, having no job is better than having one you hate. – Time
Temp jobs are the new job jobs. – Christian Science Monitor
When a Welsh cupcake shop ran out of sweets, a shopper attacked the store’s assistants. SAVE THE WELSH CUPCAKE ASSISTANTS. – Daily Mail
It’s a joke, but it’s painfully realistic: “Planet Earth PA Still Trying to Get Release Forms from Every Bird in the Serengeti.” – The Onion
Ambitious 20something New Yorkers are too busy working to get laid. – New York Observer
Britney Spears’ assistant, Brett Miller, got married over the weekend in Miami. And Brit-Brit was the maid of honor. TMZ got this photo from the ceremony. Britney’s not the first celebrity boss to stand up for their PA – Kate Bosworth served as a bridesmaid when her former assistant, Jacqui Louez, got hitched a few years ago.
Your office manager may get snotty every time someone has too many pens on their desk, but it turns out that most companies not only expect you to swipe supplies, they plan for it. A new survey of small business owners says that 54 percent of executives expect their employees to steal “something of value” from the office. Wait… something of value? I’ve definitely swiped some extra notebooks or highlighters in my day, but when they say something of value does that mean they expect someone to make off with a printer or copier? Because the logistics of that are pretty impressive. (Full disclosure: I did get a computer from my former office, but they closed down the company and let us take whatever we wanted from the office, so that doesn’t count. If you get a computer in exchange for being laid off, I think that’s fair. And I would have taken the Foosball table if there’d been a chance of it fitting in my apartment.)
Have you ever stolen from the office?
What do chick flicks have to teach you about work? Lots, like “don’t take your bad day out on your cat” (Breakfast at Tiffany’s) and “never cry at the office” (A League of Their Own). – Flavorwire
A quarter of women in the UK say they hate nicknames at the office. The most hated nicknames include “love,” “babe,” and “hon.” – The Daily Mail
Is it a good idea for a boss to play a joke on his employees by bringing a “poop cake” into the office? The answer is always, always “No.” – The Stir
Not getting enough sleep, combined with working late, makes for unproductive employees. If you need be, I’ll be napping under my desk. – Huffington Post
The Black Cloud, The Feeder, The Jezebel. No, they’re not pro wrestlers – they’re some of the coworkers you should never, ever be friends with. – Lemondrop
The Grateful Dead have a lot to teach us, and not just about drugs. They’re great managers! – The Atlantic
One upside of the recession? Failure doesn’t really mean what it used to. Yay? – Newsweek
Has anyone contacted you via Facebook claiming to offer you a job? Like most things on the internet, it’s probably a scam. – BizJournals
For some reason I have yet to figure out, Real Housewife of DC and White House party crasher Michaele Salahi has a personal assistant. – Monsters & Critics
Even the shittiest summer job has something to teach you. It might be “never work in this industry again,” but it will be something. – Lemondrop
A boss in Virginia is being accused of bullying an employee to death. Just another incentive to leave terrible working environments. Yikes. – NBC
Germany has passed a law that forbids employers from looking at a potential hire’s social networking pages. However, they are still allowed to Google potential employees. – Speigel
Why do men still get promoted more than women? One woman says she is being “mentored to death.” Interesting, and leaves just as many questions as answers. – Harvard Business Review
Some guy who has obviously seen Office Space a few too many times went apeshit on his company’s computer server. By which I mean “he shot it.” – AOL
Having friends at the office is good for morale. But is it bad for business? Either way, you’re probably screwed, so go to happy hour already. – CNN
Larry King will be staying to host his CNN talk show through the end of the year, despite announcing his retirement. Why? Some speculate it’s because his rumored replacement, Britain’s Got Talent judge Piers Morgan, needs more time to get his US work visa. Celebrities – they’re just like us! – The Guardian
Kimora Lee Simmons announced that she is leaving her company, Baby Phat… via Twitter. Don’t people send press releases anymore? – Styleite
Tokiko Shimizu, the first female head of Japan’s First Bank, says that women aren’t getting enough opportunities to get job experience early on, which hurts them when they want to take on management roles later. – Bloomberg
Trying to get a new job, even though you’re currently employed? Here are some tips for looking for a new job without getting caught. – ForbesWoman
Some brilliant person is encouraging lawyers to communicate with their assistants more. Hell, learning their names would be a good start. – Law.com
A bunch of New York City public school teachers got busted for taking fake sick days when they posted vacation photos on Facebook. For the billionth time, this is why you put your boss on limited profile. – New York Daily News
A Muslim woman is suing Disney, claiming she was fired from her job waitressing at one of their hotel restaurants because she wore a headscarf. – AOL Jobs
The very funny Allie Brosh has some tips for establishing dominance at the workplace Dog Whisperer style. And it’s in cartoon form, obvs. – The Gloss
Have you ever had to quit a job before you started it? For those of you in that enviable position, here’s how to do it without being a bad guy. – Wall Street Journal
Hi, all. As you may have noticed, there have not been a lot of posts on STA recently. I had some massive technical problems, but with some help from my friends Erik (of Fancy Fast Food) and DJ, everything’s back in working order. Now, back to your regular scheduled snarking on Naomi Campbell.
